Rewriting the Fairy Tale

Someone asked Knight recently how he felt about being called Knight in my blog. When I was writing one of my first posts about our story, I felt I needed a pseudonym because I wasn't sure that he wanted his name used. Of course, the people who read this blog who are part of our tribe already know who he is, but I desire to respect his privacy as much as possible (fortunately, he loves the way I write our story and doesn't feel his privacy is invaded by my blogging).

Knight was the first "name" that popped into my head, so I followed the intuitive nudge. At the time I wrote, "In many ways he has been my Knight in Shining Armor, even if we may not live happily ever after from a traditional perspective. We are rewriting the fairy tale and redefining 'happily ever after.'"

Knight feels that perhaps it's too big a name to live up to. But I don't feel that it is, especially when looked at from an archetypal rather than literal perspective.

Part of my path as a modern mystic is to look at my life and the world through symbolic sight. Caroline Myss is an excellent teacher in this regard. Symbolic Sight is "a way of seeing and understanding yourself, other people, and life events in terms of universal archetypal patterns. Developing symbolic sight enhances your intuitive ability as it allows you to view events, people and challenges in an objective light."

I am striving to understand our relationship through symbolic sight and archetypes. I don't perceive Knight as my rescuer or savior. That's part of rewriting the fairytale. Our traditional fairytales are about a princess being saved by a hero. I believe our fairytales need to change.

"A true soulmate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that’s holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life. A true soul mate is probably the most important person you’ll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake.” from Eat Pray Love

Knight has been a catalyst for me to save myself. Loving him and being loved by him is smacking me awake to the truth that I am the Queen and Heroine of my own life. And in my love for him, I am cheering for him to be his own Knight and rescue himself from his own wounding and sense of separation from the All.

What if we had fairytales about couples who catalyze one another to save themselves?

What if we had fairytales about couples who build each other up? Instead of stories of co-dependence or independence, what if we told stories of healthy interdependence?

What if happily ever after looks like a commitment to an authentic, healthy relationship, no matter how hard we have to work on ourselves to make it possible?

What if happily ever after looks like loving each other forever no matter the form our relationship takes, even if it means letting go because it's the most loving thing to do?


***Photograph by Annie Leibovitz